If you’ve been casting about for a Business Opportunity but find nothing looks unique enough, here’s an idea cooked up (literally) by bff (and Certified Southerner) Beni and my admittedly-Yankee self:

Miss Bacon’s Down-Home Southern Fried Sushi ™.

A TV ad has already been conceived and is ready to accompany your franchise purchase, to wit:

We only serve AUTHENTIC Southern Fried Sushi at Miss Bacon’s ™!

Why lookey here at our menu:

The Georgia Bacon Roll
Fried Okra Roll
Low Country Shrimp Boil Roll
Possum Pickins’
…and the perennial favorite:
Bacon-Wrapped Bacon

Tired of those heathen Yankee raw rolls?? Why, Miss Bacon says: “To HECK with them. Y’all come on down to Miss Bacon’s, where every piece of sushi is deep-fried to perfection by authentic Southerners.”

(Pan in to a vat of boiling oil with a Chinese and a Mexican cook stirring the ‘melting pot’. Juan, after all, is from Southern Mexico and Xan Sang Lee from Southern China…at Miss Bacon’s, the South IS the South – no ifs, ands, or world discrimination.)

Tired of that tasteless white sushi rice? (…Ad: small children grimace at white rice.)

Honey chils, Miss Bacon serves HER grub on a bed of CHEESE GRITS (Ad: close-up of deep-fried shrimp sushi on grits and happy, smiling children).

Tired of Yankee sushi houses that keep key family members waitin’ outside in the car? (Ad: pouring rain and a lonely dog howling at the car window with a sad-looking family at table inside staring at the dog.)

Why, at Miss Bacon’s the ENTIRE FAMILY is welcome (zoom to picnic table with red checkercloth with family and Fido [wearing a cool bandana around his neck] at table. Miss Bacon throws a piece of hush puppy down table’s center and murmurs “Hush, puppy.”)

Miss Bacon’s. The ONLY authentic Southern-fried sushi in the WORLD.

Y’all come on by, now.

Tip to franchisees: get Paula Dean to do your ads: she’s a little light on work, right now….

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