Jet-Puff’s New Home!

August 25, 2012

Living rurally, I have seen MORE than a few varieties of: cow, goat, sheep, rooster…enough to have become jaded on the topic of ‘strange rural sightings’. Unless it’s comin’ from Mars, I’m just not likely to be impressed!

Until the sudden arrival of Jet-Puff’s new Marshmallow Farm down the road from us.

Oh, you doubt???

A picture says 1,000 words (…two say even more…):

Jet Puffs Grown’ in the field – like a white Spring Giant Pumpkin!

These giant jet-puffed babies appeared suddenly in April – literally overnight. So it’s equally obvious that they either (a) hatched [via alien intervention] or (b) were imported (and perhaps jet-dropped by an Army Auxiliary lookin’ to practice airdrop maneuvers in a local setting?)

(…makes me long for the HOT CHOCOLATE FARM…)

Another notable note: they are GIANT: certainly no human-sized hot chocolate could take on one of THESE 15-foot babies. Ergo: they must be MARSHMALLOW MOTHERS. Yes, they are obviously out there popping out Baby Jets for the stuff we so handily discover on our supermarket shelves and use to grace the tops of our hot chocolate….

Some further Jet-Puffed commentary/observations:

1.    Puff tippin’ might become rampant among teens if these Mothers are left out in the field unattended. Beware!

2.    JetPuff farmin’ must be a piece of cake. I mean, think on it: no feeding, no caring – and marshmallows are well known for being fluffy, melt-in-your mouth bits of happiness. Which totally eliminates the mooing, crowing, baaing and other potentially annoying vocalizations experienced on surrounding farms.

As usual truth is MUCH more boring than (apparent) reality: research indicates that farmers now “protect hay in plastic” to shield it from hazards such as wind and rain. (Unheralded is the effect of unregulated cow lips on said hay bales [should cows escape from their pastures] and also unmentioned in the equation is the fact that hay must’ve gained a LOT in value this year; ‘cause Jet Puffs have NOT appeared in local fields here  (where rain seldom happens at harvest time) in prior years. I am sure Tons ‘O Fun Plastic Sheeting must be ECSTATIC about the results of their Save the Hay marketing program this year…

A personally-conducted survey of farms to the North of my county (which do get much more rain) indicates that Jet Puffs have LONG been a feature; but here? There is no explanation of their sudden appearance here in Sonoma County – unless you refer to my opening theories, above (re: aliens or Army involvement).

And, ultimately – it all seems like fluff to me….

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